Tips for Sponsoring Healthy Identities

• Be aware of your child's actions and behaviors and what they tell you about him.
  
  
• Ask questions about why your child chose a topic, or picked an outfit, or read a certain book or magazine. Ask objectively without judgment.
  
  
• Give your child choices about activities she would like to participate in.
  
  
• Offer him reasonable food and clothes choices.
  
  
• Compliment your child on her personal style.
  
  
• Listen to your child's ideas openly and don't force your ideas on him.
  
  
• Offer suggestions without controlling your child's ideas and behaviors.
  
  
• Make sure you know your identity and have the confidence to let your child have hers without criticism and judgment.
  
  
• Create activities that help your child identify who he is. (Recently my daughters made collages. They cut out pictures of everything that symbolized themselves and then reviewed each others' work. Then they personalized the projects even more and hung them over their beds.)
  
  
• Have your child create a family party or one with some friends. Ask her to plan it and design what she wants. What kind of food, music, or atmosphere would she like?

The healthy identities of children are their keys to knowing themselves and seeking what they want in life.