According to the findings, children learn to assess their social competence in sports through the feedback received from parents and coaches (Ewing, 1997). Self-esteem, however, is developed through the evaluation of one's own abilities as well as an assessment of the responses received from others. Since our children watch our responses, and those of their coaches, for signs of approval or disproval of their behavior, it is critical that we offer as much positive feedback as possible.

Fair Play

Learning how to play fair is perhaps the most important lesson a child can glean from participating in youth sports. "It is important to remember that the attitudes and behavior taught to children in sports carry over to adult life," according to AACAP. "Parents should take an active role in helping their child develop good sportsmanship. To help your child get the most out of sports, you need to be actively involved." This means:

• providing emotional support and positive feedback
  
  
• attending some games and talking about them afterward
  
  
• having realistic expectations for your child
  
  
• learning about the sport and supporting your child's involvement
  
  
• helping your child talk with you about their experiences with the coach and other team members
  
  
• helping your child handle disappointments and losing, and
  
  
• modeling respectful spectator behavior

How to Choose?

If you have a child over the age of four, you know that there are dozens of activities and sports for them to become involved in. There are so many sports and physical activities available to our children that it can be difficult to choose which ones are best for your particular child. When deciding what sports to sign children up for, particularly young children, it is important to consider their personalities and interests.

Assertive children may be better suited for team sports such as soccer and basketball where close contact between other children is common. Less aggressive children may prefer baseball, swimming, or gymnastics where they are given more space and independence from the rest of the team. The most important thing to remember, however, is not to push your child into any activity they are not comfortable with. The result will be a stressed out child who will continue to resist you.